And lo, upon the approach of the celebration of the birth of our Lord, the angel of the Lord did appear in a great and heavenly light unto the lowly scribe to share with him the Word.
“Lowly scribe, I bring to you tidings of great joy. It has come to pass that you shall honor the tradition of your fathers and their fathers, and bring forth to the feast the holy Country Ham.”
And the scribe gazed upon the Lord’s messenger in awe, saying, “Dude, how did you get in here?”
“Fear not,” spoke the Angel. “There are great preparations to be made. First, thou shalt seek the holy Country Ham in a distant land.”
“Does Delaware count?” asketh the scribe.